Happiness in Every Rainbow

Assalamualaikum, Hai and Anyeonghasaeyo~~

     It's really been a while since the last update and I'm seriously feel very sorry about it. Well, I guess it would be almost a year right? So many things happen in my life and it goes to every each of us. I guess there's no one in this world that have a calm peaceful day all day long right? It includes me as one of human being in this world.

    So based on the intro of this entre, what do you think I would write about? Well, honestly right now I feel like want to sit in a corner and thinking back about all the past and sad things that had happen in my life while listening to all the sad songs in my lappy. Sorry for being emo in the first entre of this year, I don't know what had really come in my mind lately.

     But if you do feel the same way as I am, I guess that is normal then. Everyone would love to have some time for themselves so that they can think about what had really happen in their life. It is a normal thing. Even though that kind of world is 'entertaining' but I really hope that you all wouldn't become fond of it. It would eventually become a poison for us. So I hope that after being 'emo' for a while, you all would come to the reality and look pass everyone and everything that you had in your life. The happiness that all of them could bring to you and you to them. Then you would think that this time right now is the best time in your life. For the happiness right now or in the future, cause after the rain there is always a rainbow. A rainbow that all of us could see and the feels that comes with it.

p/s: see you in another entre with writing that had a thousand of rainbows in it. :)

The Most Precious Word

Sorry...

          Everyone knows what is the real meaning of sorry... Whether if we have ever said it in our life or not, but the truth is there are not a single person whom never had known the word of sorry in this world. But do we realised that or do we have ever asked ourself on how many times in a day do we say sorry if we made a mistakes? Do we say the little but precious word 'sorry' very often or not?' It depends on ourselves and we are the one who knows ourselves better than anyone in the world...
          Actually, why we didn't say sorry to someone we had make mistakes before? And is it really hard to say just a simple word of sorry? Do the word would hurt or kill us if we said it?. That is the question that keeps on bugging in my mind whenever I was in that situation. When someone made a mistakes towards me but as the usual thing that I'd do is I would ignore it.. Thinking of that person may not know that he/she had made a mistakes or he/she didn't like to say that word or even didn't know the existence of that word in this world...
          But then, when the time passed, I get to know on how much valuable and precious of hearing just the simple word of sorry. It seems to be very valuable now but when it comes to be that way, I hardly heard that word now. Maybe because of my attitude before, who keeps ignoring to hear that word, so most of the people used to not saying sorry to me now... But I would figure that way out because it is my problems...
          So, the way of we saying that word also matters... It would be one of a great factor to show on how we know to differentiate whether we sincerely feels sorry if we made a mistakes or not. Because right now, even if we keeps on hearing that word but the sincerity level would be different. If someone says sorry and then just walk away, it means that he/she didn't feel sorry at all. But it would be different if he/she says sorry and keeps on telling us that word, it means he/she really means it. Well, this is based on my experience and while looking on the others.. Actually, I had grown a new habit for myself which is keeps on looking at others or the most accurate word is observing others...
          Well, that is my problem but the things is, sorry is really a big matters even with the non-stop growing of the world nowadays.. It is one of the most word that matters for someone... So as a conclusion, I want to say sorry for every mistakes that I had made to everyone who knows me or not... May our live would always remain in peace.. :)

p/s: this is not just for the loyal readers but also for myself to reflect on how have we made our day or ourselves in the eyes of the world and most especially in the eyes of the God.. :)

A Little Hardship

Today, I'm really sad and I would like to share it with my lovely readers...
          Remember of me telling on how much I feel like wanting to go back home in my previous post? Actually for this last sem, I had bought a return way plane ticket to my hometown... And I was very happy since I'm going to have two full weeks of holiday eventhough for a usual student, they might have two or three full months of holiday but for my case, I've got only two weeks of holiday but I'm still glad if I'm going to have only two weeks.
          But then, everything went off when my university wants to cut the holidays where it supposed to end in 6th July but then it end in 29th June. I feel really upset about it because I didn't have the enough holiday that I had expected and the fact that I had already buy my plane ticket. I also had plan my schedule for my full time two weeks of holiday where I want to learn cooking, sewing and planned to go for an outing... But then, I had to replanned again... I really hate this kind of stuff... Its really makes me sad... :'(

Living Alone

                Today’s post is about living alone. Okay, I decided to write about this post because right now I know the feeling of living alone. Maybe it’s because of holiday and there is none here in the college that makes me feel so alone. I barely could see a person around so it’s really suffocating and I think I’d become insane. Talking to my own, singing loudly, dancing like a crazy person and even start talking to my teddy bear….

                I don’t know what exactly happen to me. I like to live alone in the room but if I were left alone in this college is something that I really did not want and never cross my mind. It’s really feels like living alone in this whole world. No fun, no entertainment and I feel like there is no life in me. Waking up in the morning without any sounds of human is something that is really makes me becoming more insane.

                There is once where my friends had gone to my college and they said that they felt my college is like a hospital. Quiet, the white paint on the wall and the tidiness looks exactly like a hospital. Remembering back about what they had said makes me feels like living in an insane hospital. Where I could do whatever I want because there is no one around. Even if I shout maybe there is no one could hear it and no one would prevent me from shouting over and over again.

                And now the only thing I could do to prevent this loneliness is by watching movies or drama and listening to music. This is what I would like to do in my holiday isn’t? But now my holidays only have been 4 days and I feel like it’s already a boring holiday.  What should I do to overcome this? Urghh… it’s so boring and it’s so suffocating… :(

How Interesting Life Could Be?

          I already said that recently I have a Korean drama fever. So the post of this week is also related to one of the drama that I've been watching. 'What do you think that makes life interesting?' is what was in the script of the drama. Because of that, I've started to think on that question. 'What exactly makes life interesting?'.
          From the drama, it said that because we don't know the future that what makes we feel life interesting. Is it? And because of that, I've started to think about it. And I think so too...
          Life does feel interesting if we don't know what will happen in the future. Because a lot of things might happen that will makes us whether happy or sad. So even if we feel sad, sometimes we might find happiness and vice versa. And there are a lot of thing that might happen in the future that we would not know yet. Like solving a puzzle, is what I always feel of life. To discover a new thing is more interesting for me then to ending something. I often thinking of why people make an attempt to suicide? Is it they don't feel like their life interesting? Their life valuable? And until now I couldn't find the right answer to it...
          For me, everyday we will be meeting a lot of people. Whether it is someone we might know or someone new or someone we will meet everyday, but that what makes life feel interesting. People will have their own uniqueness and their own behavior, and it is up to us to discover their specialness in their own way. And absolutely, there is a lot of person around us whether we acknowledge them or not that gives us the chance to discover it ourselves and to know them better.
          I think that there is a lot of thing that me myself didn't discover yet. Such as visiting a new place (if possible I want to go around the world), learning a lot of new things (even if it is out of my interests) and meeting a lot of people. It is what makes me keep alive. To discover everything outside the border of my life. To start making a step out of it, is what I feel makes my life interesting. To have the courage to go out on an adventure. Unluckily, I'm not from a rich family nor I am a boy, so it is clearly a dangerous and a hard journey for me. But someday (before I get married), I want to explore the world to  my heart content. To find what is there outside the other world.

          And I think, there is a lot of things that makes we feel life interesting. And it depends on each of us to view it in what kind of side. A bright or dark side is exactly on our hands, and I hope everyone that read this post choose the best way in viewing their own life because we only have one life in this lifetime. Choose it wisely or else you'd never know what would you meet in the end of the road.... :)

Karnival Pertama Saya

Pernahkah anda terlibat secara langsung di belakang tabir sesuatu aktiviti? Apakah perasaan anda? Penat? Gembira? Marah? Atau sedih?

Well saya ada rasa semua benda tersebut. Start dari mula saya rasa excited then marah dan sedih. Tapi in the end, saya rasa sangat gembira. ‘Everything when well’ itu la apa yang saya fikirkan pada akhir aktiviti tersebut.

Dalam aktiviti tersebut, selaku ajk program saya merupakan antara orang yang sangat sibuk pada hari tersebut. Sebelum aktiviti berlangsung lagi saya ada terdengar mengenai sekiranya aktiviti tidak berjalan dengan lancar, post program merupakan post yang pertama sekali yang akan disalahkan. Start dari situ, saya rasa takut. Bagaimana sekiranya aktiviti yang saya handle tidak berjalan dengan lancar? Saya merupakan orang yang pertama sekali yang akan disalahkan...

But then, alhamdulilllah aktiviti itu berjalan dengan baik walaupun kurang crowd almaklumlah forum. Majoriti orang tidak berminat untuk mengikuti forum ataupun yang setara dengannya. Begitu jugalah saya.

Habis je aktiviti yang saya handle tu, pada keesokan harinya saya tetap sibuk membantu post-post lain dalam menyelesaikan tugas mereka. Walaupun sumbangan saya sangat sedikit tapi saya sangat gembira kerana dapat membantu meringankan tugas mereka.

Petang itu merupakan kali pertama saya bermain target shooting. Seriously, walaupun sebelum ini saya pernah memegang M-16  namun saya merasakan bermain target shooting is much better. Mungkin sebab ketika menggunakan M-16, saya langsung tidak dapat menembak sasaran dengan tepat tetapi ketika bermain target shooting, saya dapat menembak 4 daripada 15 palette tepat pada sasarannya. Haha... Saya tak sangka terer gak saya ni dalam bermain benda tersebut.

Malam penutupan tu, saya telah bertugas sebagai usher di mana saya kena meng’usher’ seorang YB yang merupakan orang paling penting dalam majlis tersebut. Sudahlah ini merupakan pertama kali saya bertugas sebagai usher malah saya juga telah di arahkan untuk meng’usher’ orang yang sangat penting. Saya rasa sangat gemuruh dan rasa sangat takut sekiranya saya membuat kesilapan sepanjang peng‘usher’an saya. Saya juga turut terfikir untuk memberikan tugas tersebut kepada orang lain.

Namun in the end, saya tetap menjalankan tugas saya. Dan semestinya saya rasa saya telah banyak membuat kesilapan sehinggakan pada malam post mortem tue, walaupun saya tidak ditegur secara depan-depan namun saya tahu, felo tersebut bercakap mengenai kesilapan saya. Saya tahu dan saya sedar kesilapan yang saya lakukan. Walaupun saya rasa sangat malu kerana ditegur begitu namun saya akan mengambil iktibar untuk dijadikan pengalaman untuk masa hadapan. Itupun sekiranya saya menjadi usher lagi tetapi saya rasa saya takkan ingin menjadi seorang usher lagi. Hahaha...

Walaupun banyak benda yang terjadi semasa dua hari karnival ini berlangsung, namun saya rasa enjoy dan gembira. Walaupun sangat penat namun saya berharap agar dapat menyumbang tenaga untuk membuat event lagi. Bagi saya membuat event sebegini memang sangat mencabar, namun oleh kerana saya merupakan seorang yang sukakan cabaran, saya berharap agar dapat membuat event lagi namun event yang berbeza. “Banyak mencuba akan menghasilkan banyak pengalaman bukan?” That’s what I want. Mencuba banyak perkara even perkara tersebut sangat challenging buat saya. But that’s makes life interesting and this time the carnival had make my whole week interesting.....